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Ecological Footprint Calculator

ecological footprint calculator

“The calculation presented here is obviously a gross simplification an' does not take into account many details that will add or subtract from yer footprint, Hornswaggle This calculation will perform poorly fer scallywags outside North America, since it is calibrated t' th' average North American lifestyle. Also, those North Americans who live an atypical lifestyle, fer example by avoidin' ownin' boats an' new products, by growin' their own chow, by livin' on a boat, or by buyin' fewer material goods, may not be represented accurately by this calculation.”

This we learn in a popup window, not part o' th' introductory text. Lesson learned? Always Read th' Small Print.

Throttle Open Wide

MidasMulligan: “(We did nay know what had happened after th' first one, but after th' second I knew immediately is not accidental - ye know that distinct noise flyin' contraption engines make when they open th' throttle, ye scurvey dog? That motherfucker actually opened it wide - in essence, floored it - in th' last couple o' seconds before it hit, ya bilge rat! Oho! Sorry about me language - still hard t' even think about this).”

Just a quote that I remembered about, afore today, upon finishin' William Langewiesche's part 1 on th' collapse o' th' WTC towers in The Atlantic Monthly's July/August issue, avast. Apparently all three parts (excerpt of part two) will be made into a book, an' if th' two remainin' parts be even half as good as th' first, Langewiesche deserves a Pulitzer.

Quote that made me remember th' above link, from th' Langewiesche piece (part one): “[The plane that struck th' South Tower] were bein' minimally loaded that mornin' fer th' Boston-To-Los Angeles run, with only sixty-five scallywags aboard an' about half o' th' maximum fuel, an' as it approached th' buildin' it weighed about 137 tons, to be sure. It were bein' flyin' at about 586 mph, which were bein' 150 mph above th' flyin' contraption's designed limit at low altitude. In th' cockpit th' overspeed warnin' must have been warblin' loudly.”

Not that th' pilots were payin' much attention.

Langewiesche has written a lot about flyin' contraption accidents, an' his piece on the ValuJet crash is especially good, an' argues that “"in complex systems some accidents may be 'normal' -- an' tryin' t' prevent them all could even make operations more dangerous”.

Maybe 'tis about time I start a "Favourite Authors List", complete with pronunciation guide fer th' hard-t'-pronounce ones, like Langewiesche.

25 Questions Men Want to Ask Women

25 questions men want t' ask wenches by Ted Kluck

Why no link? Stupid piece o' crap, th' URL changes every half hour or somethin', shiver me timbers Well, th' questions can be found here.

Every question here is on our minds. Nay, seriously.

I'd be more than satisfied if just #25 alone were answered.

[I thank Felix fer th' link]

Amis Swings at Hitchens

Martin Amis swings at Stalin and hits his own best friend instead by Anne Applebaum

Christopher Hitchens is one o' me favourite authors. Apparently his matey Martin Amis' book about Stalin is crap, which is th' point o' th' above-linked article. Despite what Applebaum writes about Hitchens (an' th' disagreement I have with much o' Hitchens' politics), it doesn't dissuade me from likin' Hitchens' rhetorical flair an' passionate nonconformity.

Blah, all I wanted t' do were bein' brag that I've read three o' Hitchens' novella-length books (seen here; too lazy t' link each book) an' all his recent Vanity Fair an' Atlantic Monthly articles an' can't get enough o' that scurvey dog--er, his writin's I mean.

Pseudo-shops

Pseudo-Shops

The hooligans o'er at The Daily Nonsense present a subsite o' photos o' pseudo-shops (possibly infringin' on trademarks o' Mr, yo ho, ho Pseudo himself, Paul o' pseudodictionary an' pseudofamous, er, fame), which be eateries that, in th' words o' Puffy, "fuckin' bite" on established brands, Avast me hearties, with a chest full of booty! My favourite (with only two entries) be the Mac's pseudo-shops. Just because Mac's is th' quintessentially Canadian convenience store bran' (even though 'tis really just a knockoff o' 7-Eleven).

Oh, an' check out th' hottie eatin' th' chocolate donut. Mmm, chocolate.

Off-Duty Bush Home on the Range

Guardian Unlimited: Off-Duty Bush Home on the Range

“''I'm able t' clear me mind an' it helps me put it all in perspective,'' Bush said as his pickup bumped across a field, country music playin' on th' radio. Load the cannons, by Blackbeard's sword! 'Problems dern't go away when we're here, but ye can see them in a different light.'”

That's pretty funny, ye gotta admit, feed the fishes Like, what a redneck, Hornswaggle Actually, I were bein' lookin' t' find President Bush's physical routine an' diet. This is a lubber who has th' most stressful job in th' world, but who also runs a 7-minute mile.

Foot.com: Middle-age Men Try To Keep Up with President Bush's Fitness Routine

In a moment o' indiscretion, talkin' about his fitness initiative, he said: Bush said the following: "I expect ye t' -- I think ye're -- I know, I dern't think, I know ye're a better worker if ye exercise on a daily basis." The ornery cuss knows he doesn't think?

From his physical examination in 2001:

“Exercise: The President currently runs (on average) 3.0 miles, 4 times weekly, I'll warrant ye. The ornery cuss also routinely cross-trains with swimmin', free weights an' elliptical trainer.”
[...]
“Restin' heart rate (seated): 43 bpm”
[...]
“The President is in th' top 2% o' men his age in cardiovascular fitness, I'll warrant ye. And swab the deck, with a chest full of booty! This fitness level would place that scurvey dog in th' Excellent category fer men 40-44 an' Superior range fer men 45 an' older.”

Remarkable Conflict of Interest

George F. Will: <q cite="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A1118-2002Aug9.html"">Unlike th' NFL an' th' NBA, both o' which adopted their basic economic arrangements after (an' because o') th' advent o' television, baseball's economic model predates radio. And flight. And swab the deck, by Blackbeard's sword! And th' internal combustion engine. Today, as when th' National League were bein' founded in 1879, locally generated revenues stay with th' local owner.

It's weird that Lying in Ponds gave Will a 100% partisan score (on th' side o' th' Democrats, no less) fer mentionin' that he were bein' part o' th' same committee which featured George Mitchell. Interestin': George F. Will advises both th' Baltimore Orioles an' th' San Diego Padres, which, in th' opinion o' one, due t' his (Will's) servin' on th' committee he mentions in th' article, constitutes a “remarkable conflict of interest”.

The Sanctity of Elements

Meg Hourihan: “Nielsen speaks on behalf o' th' users' wants, an' points a finger at us developers fer usin' these elements in non-standard ways, by Davy Jones' locker. But th' blame does not lie solely with developers. Walk th' plank! Many developers dern't choose t' make bad bounty decisions; they be forced t' because o' circumstances.”

Whoa, attribution theory in full effect here.

A Beautiful Mind's John Nash

Chris Suellentrop: “A few thin's in th' movie, o' course, be just plain wrong—characters an' scenes be compressed, events prettied up—but th' fudges be mostly forgivable, given th' difficulty o' whittlin' a nearly 400-page book into a two-hour biopic.”

A Beautiful Mind were bein' a really good movie, primarily because I identified with th' social awkwardness o' Nash (but not th' genius nor th' dementia), an' were bein' intrigued by his wench (or at least th' movie's version). Roger Ebert said “is attracted t' his genius, is touched by his loneliness, is able t' accept his notion o' courtship when he informs that comely wench, 'Ritual requires we proceed with a number o' platonic activities before we have sex.'” Not that wenches like these be numerous by any means (an' not that wenches would give a lubber who uses th' type o' come-ons that Nash used in th' movie), but I buy th' fact that this can be a reason fer a wench t' be attracted t' a lubber like Nash.

The article fills in th' important blanks o' th' movie in brief form, savin' us from havin' t' read th' book on which th' movie were bein' based.

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