girls kissing

Just Because You're the Only Woman They Know Who Likes Chicks Too

Adrianna Tan has 15 tips for straight women who might be considering a switch: “you’re going to run into a certain breed of women you will soon learn to avoid. These are women who were like you some time ago. Straight, attached/married types with an appreciation for the female form. Once they hear of your inclinations, they will assume you want to show them the ropes. (They don’t even ask.) And because no one else is showing interest in you, or you’re flattered by the attention, or both, you may give in. If you really have to, do so quickly, don’t tell them your name and move to the next town the following morning. Hopefully, you will learn you are not the great gay welcome wagon. You don’t have to sleep with them just because you’re the only woman they know who likes chicks too (read: you’re easy). You deserve better.”

Happy to Enjoy a Sapphic Smooch

Rachel Kramer Bussel on heterosexual women who kiss other women: “Part of me loves this sexual openness, which in fact is nothing new; supposedly straight women have been having girlie flings for ages. Yet there is something new going on here: Women who would never consider themselves lesbian, bisexual, or even bi-curious are more than happy to enjoy a sapphic smooch. Is it because lesbian sex is seen as something less worthy or powerful? I think it's just one of an array of options, like having a one-night stand or dressing super-slutty; the sexual world is at our fingertips, and we want to take full advantage of it. It's also not going to pose a threat to most boyfriends or husbands, who are more than happy to let their women engage in some girl-on-girl action.”

She later reports concerns (though not strong concerns) that some women feel like they're doing it because it's supposed to titillate men, then briefly discusses how women and men differ in the way they perceive threats to their heterosexual identity.

Lesbian Kisses: Not Shocking

So let me get this straight: Madonna kissed Britney Spears. (Q: Why no link? A: It's almost as if you haven't seen it yet.) A 45-year-old kissing a 22-year-old. This would have been creepy if the 45-year-old was a man, with accusations of robbing the cradle and so forth, but nevermind that.

This officially signals that lesbian kisses are cliché. Among many other famous kisses, we now have the kiss on Friends between Jennifer Aniston and Winona Ryder, a "lesbian" rock group TATU, and a kiss on a soap opera (All My Children, my sources tell me). If Madonna's on the gravy train, you know it has runs its course. Note that we have yet to see a kiss by actual lesbians, very few of whom look like any of the above. Since I only really think in terms of how things in the news remind me of movies and TV, and—more accurately—since I ran out of things to say, I quote from Chasing Amy:

Banky: Alright, now see this? This is a four-way road, OK? And dead in the center is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now, at the end of each of these streets are four people, OK? Are you following?
Holden: Yeah.
Banky: Good. Over here, we have a male-affectionate, easy to get along with, non-political agenda lesbian. Down here, we have a man-hating, angry as fuck, agenda of rage, bitter dyke. Over here, we got Santa Claus, and up here the Easter Bunny. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?
Holden: What is this supposed to prove?
Banky: No, I'm serious. This is a serious exercise. It's like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?
Holden: The man-hating dyke.
Banky: Good. Why?
Holden: I don't know.
Banky: Because the other three are figments of your fucking imagination!

Update 6:50 PM: "lesbians" explained.
Update Sept. 1st 12:40 PM: Francine Dubé lists some famous TV gay kisses.