Poor Girl
Much has been written by yours truly about talking to strangers on the bus as well as asking a stranger on the bus if they would like to talk, and how there's not enough talking happening on the bus. While I still think people here in Vancouver should really get to know their seatmates, there is such a thing as too much, as witnessed today.
I was sitting on the bus, on the seats parallel to the windows, so that people sitting on them face the window across the aisle, writing on my laptop (I swear I'm the only guy who pulls out his laptop on the bus), and basically feeling sorry for the girl sitting across from me. She had a guy, much older than him, sit right next to her and start talking to her. She was trying to avoid talking to him, but he kept on asking questions, and didn't get the idea when she kept looking away from him. I recognized the behaviour, since I also think that not looking at a person determined to talk to me will make them stop. Recalling a story of a colleague who did nothing in a similar situation, though not being in a physical position to do much, and closed his eyes thinking to himself "poor girl". I thought the same thing about the girl sitting across from me, since when we made eye contact, she gave me the nervous "I wish this guy would leave me alone" smile. I had enough of him trying to talk to her, and of her unease, so I intervened, saying "excuse me, I know this might sound rude, but I think she wants to be left alone". He replied—directly to me, and not to her—with a non-sequitur, and I guess he assumed (falsely) that I wanted to talk to him. Luckily for me there was a guy sitting on my side of the seats who intervened for me, saying "you can talk to me, I like talking to people", after which they had a boring conversation about stuff I didn't care about.
I'm thankful for that guy intervening, but I don't know if the girl was thankful for my intervention on her part. She gave me a shy smile as she left the bus, but I couldn't tell if it was a "thank you" or her being nice and just shyly smiling. Intervening in a conversation that I wasn't invited to felt rude (hence the admission to the guy that it felt rude), but I do feel a least a little better than I would have if she had to keep trying not to talk to the guy.
He didn't seem overly creepy or anything, but I imagine young women have to deal with this kind of thing a lot. Not being a young woman, I wouldn't know. At least in this case I recognized that someone was being given attention that was unwanted, since she seemed a lot more interested in just zoning out. I don't blame her: the bus is good for that, though I think too many people zone out because they don't have anybody to talk to.
